This man of mine

One thing that I love about my husband is his ability to turn any conversation into a gospel related one. This morning we were talking about breast milk and formula. Because that's what new parents do right? Mid conversation he looks at me and says, "formula is like every other religion. You can feed an infant formula, and he/she will be satisfied. But once you feed them breast milk (aka: Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) they can never go back and just formula will not satisfy them!"

How I love this man.

Thoughts on motherhood

A couple of people have asked me how being a new mommy is coming along. Being a mother is huge. Something I have been preparing for my whole entire life and now it's here! That seriously boggles my mind. I look at my little girl and think, "I'm your mama! Holy cow I am your mama!" To those who asked,  I would have to say that being a mother has surprisingly come very naturally. Like it was rooted in me the whole entire time, but waiting for the right moment to bring itself forth. And that moment was when I held my little girl for the first time. My motherly instincts came in full force. Sure I still struggle with every day new mommy things, I still look/feel very awkward carrying a car seat around, and I can't seem to get myself ready until after 1:00 but being a mother is wonderful. Amazing. And as always, a working progress. Good thing Evelyn is very patient with me!

Fathers that I love

Father's Day was met with a lot of mixed emotions. Some tears, some smiles, and some laughter.

To my father: I couldn't have asked for a better role model father in my life. You have always been there for me, through my high and low times. I'll never forget that moment in the hospital around Christmas time. You and I were reading a book you had found. We got to a chapter that got pretty emotional for you. For both of us. You couldn't finish your sentence. I looked at you and said, "dad, let me read for a bit". It was my little moment to help you however I could. I don't know that I made it very far either but it was good to take over for you when I always felt so helpless during this time. You have always treated mom like a queen and spent lots of time with us kids. We all have so many memories of things you have done with us. You are loved by so many people. And loved especially by your family. I love you dad!

To my father-in law: You have taken me under your wings and have made me feel like one of your own daughters. Made me feel at home. I am so grateful for the counsel and wisdom you have given to both Jake and I as we dated and in our newly married life. I thank you for being such a wonderful father to Jake as he was growing up. He looks up to you in so many ways and has learned much from you. Trust me! Whatever you had taught him, you did a great job. I am so grateful for the way you love your family. I see it all the time when we get together. You always check on everyone and make sure they are all doing okay. You are a great man and I am so glad to have you has my father-in law.

To my grandfather Ivan: Every time I see a tree,  I am reminded of you. Reminded of your love for trees. For your love of life. Your love to watch things grow. A trees roots need to grow deep and strong in order for the tree to survive. Your love, hard work and knowledge has made our family grow deep and strong and we all support you and love you. I am also reminded of your love for theater and how it was instilled in me. I remember when I was in sixth grade and I was trying out for the lead of a play we were doing. I would bring my lines over to your house and we would practice and practice. I also had to faint during my tryout and you helped me faint like a professional! I did end up getting the lead thanks to you! Jake and I have loved being able to spend time with you these past couple of months. Bringing you to his basketball games and seeing you cheer him on and get so excited about the game. It just made my heart swell with love for you. To see you so happy. Jake and I would frequently come up and tell you all the new things that were happening in our life and you were always so excited for us. You are also loved by so many people grandpa. As one of them, I just wanted to tell you how much I love you and have learned so much from you.

Happy Father's Day to all those wonderful fathers out there!

Day of rest

I've noticed myself saying this lately.

"They say Sunday is a day of rest but it's probably the day that I am the busiest."

Today during Relief Society I realized that I had it all the wrong way. Sunday being a day of rest is a day of worldly rest. Not a day of physical rest. It is a day for us to learn and focus solely on the Lord. I tend to catch myself complaining that I don't get enough rest on Sunday with meetings and everything else that comes with callings. Instead I should be grateful that Heavenly Father has given me this day, and given me these calling to better myself and to have opportunities to serve others which in turn serves our Heavenly Father. Sunday is a day for spiritual uplifting. My idea of Sunday being a day of rest has changed and I have a new desire to be put to work. To further on the work of the Lord. To fill my Sundays with service, scripture reading, putting my all into my callings, and much more.

Review

So I finished my Audrey Hepburn book and loved it! Thanks Jamie! You definitely know me well. I'd thought I would do a little review for you book lovers. I love Audrey Hepburn and loved learning about her life. There were so many things she went through as a little girl during WWII and through her life that I had no idea about. It's not a "thrilling" book as you would say, and I could actually stop and put it down, however I learned a great deal from reading about her life. She always put others before herself and had a love of life that I envy. If you love Audrey Hepburn as much as I do, this would be a great book to read.

Blessed

Tuesday is usually my temple night. Well my roommate and I headed to the Provo temple and found that this night was just dedicated to the young men. They had a group of around 75 men that were doing 500 names! Well we decided we would just head up to the Timpanogos temple. It hit me on the way there how blessed we are. That we could just drive to another temple close by and be able to do temple work.

I love Utah.

Spring Fever

I woke up this morning to the sound of snow shovels. sigh. I can't really complain about this winter because we haven't had that much of a winter. However, I am so so ready for spring. Or even summer for that matter. I am ready to play outside all day. I am ready to fly a kite. I am ready to go on a bike ride without my ears and nose freezing off. I am ready to wear sandals again. I miss the grass. I am ready to go on a walk without having to put on copious amounts of clothing. I miss being able to read outside. I miss driving with the sun roof and windows down.

I miss these.

And I miss these.

Family

Today I got into the topic of Families and The Home with my roommate and my home teachers. We just talked about how Christmas is a great tool that brings the families together. That got me thinking. I've noticed especially this year how much that means to me. To have the family all home. To sit down together at the dinner table for a meal. My family is slowly starting to experience that time, when no one eats together any more, family home evening doesn't always happen, children are off at college, some in crazy places like Idaho, etc. This Christmas year was very special to me. I just loved every minute of time I was able to spend with my family. Not only to know that I can always come home to people who will always love me, but to know that my home is a place where the spirit can abide. I think sometimes I take that for granted.

Not everyone has that.

I'm so blessed to have a wonderful dad who is a worthy priesthood holder. Who loves his kids and would do anything for them. Who loves the Lord. Who loves....everyone. Unconditionally. Loves my mom. Speaking of my mother, I have a wonderful mother. A lot of who I am today is because of her. Even those dang emotions! I can talk to her about anything. She puts up with five crazy kids and loves us all. At least I hope she does! She is the glue to our family. She is my best friend. I also can't forget my siblings. These past two years I have become so much closer to them. I love spending time with them. Learning about them. Being able to share experiences with them. To teach them as well as being taught by them. I love them all so much and am so grateful to have been given the opportunity to be apart of this family.

Decisions

These past couple of days have been really hard for me for some reason. Everything in my life I have had planned for a while. I never really have had to make a hard decision because I just knew what I would be doing. Well lately a mission has been entering my mind. Constantly. It occurred to me about a week ago that I could be turning in my papers in 3 months.

I about had a heart attack.

I didn't think it was that soon! Now for the longest time I have said I was not going on a mission. It just wasn't for me and I honestly don't/didn't want to go. If I'm gonna go it's going to be because I truly want to. Or I guess if I find it's what the Lord wants me to do. I have had many wonderful examples of women in my life who have gone on missions and have said it has changed their life. My mom, many aunts, friends, and a cousin who is about to leave. I can already see the change in her as she prepares to leave. I feel like there are so many signs that are pointing this way or that way. I could go on a mission. I could get into the dental hygiene program. I could meet a very special guy. I can do missionary work where I am right now. There are so many ways this could go and any of those would be great! But just picking one kinda messes up everything else. So it needs to be THE right one. I was so certain about my life and how it would be. All the pieces were put together. I know I need to ponder things and ask my Heavenly Father, but honestly....I am afraid of the answer I might get.

Oh heaven help me.

Practical PC for Dummies

So I have to take this computer class online to finish up my generals. I purchased my books for the class and started going over chapter 1. After a bit of reading, I made sure that I got the right book because this seemed way, WAY too easy.

Nope. It's the right book.

Chapter 1 contains:
1. Where's the power switch?
2. What is a mouse and keyboard?
3. How do I turn my computer off?
4. What if my computer asks me for a password?

I'm paying these people how much to teach me how to turn on and off my computer? This is absolutely ridiculous. I looked ahead a couple of chapters to see if it gets any harder and I came across chapter 7.

Chapter 7 contains:
1. What is the internet?
2. What's an IP address?

I was complaining to my dad how stupid this was, and he brought up how ironic it was that here chapter 7 is teaching you what the internet is and and how to use it, when you would have to know that already to actually get to this class because it's online!!! Can you see why I am annoyed?

Thankful

Yesterday we had the Crosland family over for our monthly FHE. It's always good to see all the cousins and catch up with everyone. After we had dinner and what not, we all gathered around and my dad and his brother gave my grandpa and grandma a blessing. Our family is going to have some rough times a head of us and watching these brothers give their parents a special blessing, made me realize how blessed I am to have worthy priesthood holders in my life. Sometimes I forget how much the priesthood can do and what the priesthood means to me. It's so comforting to know that I can always go to my dad in any time of need and have him give me a blessing. Not only being able to go to my dad, uncle, or grandfather for a blessing, but even friends or ward members.

I'm grateful to you. For being there for me.

Mistake

You know when you say something that you totally didn't mean, just said it without thinking, and wished you could take it back but it's already done it's damage?

Me too.

Farewell

Sadly, this summer is coming to an end very quickly. It's been an odd summer with weird weather, but it's also been a great one. I'm ready for some change though. This next semester comes to me with mixed feelings. I'm really excited for the semester to start because I like being in a routine, sometimes I actually like school, getting to meet more people is always great, and this will probably be the easiest semester I have ever had, which I definitely need. I'm not looking forward to this semester because I like going to seven peaks every day. I like being able to sleep in and not have to worry about anything. I enjoy being able to hang out with my friends. I usually become a hermit during the school semester so don't expect to see much of me. I am also not looking forward to my 7 am class. I am sooo not a morning person.

It's weird to think this is my third year of college. Wow!

Sundays

I remember when I was little, not being really thrilled when Sunday came around. It was so boring and you couldn't do anything! You couldn't play with your friends, or watch your favorite movie.
Now that I am older, my feelings of Sunday have changed. It's a day of rest. Sometimes literally. Sleep is very important to me. It's also a day of rest from everyday living. Being caught up in everything that is going on the world. It's a change to spiritually re boost yourself. Today I went up to Music and the Spoken Word with a friend. I always love going to those and getting to see my mom. Usually they have a guess singer that comes along and performs. Today they had a huge choir from Great Britain that were fantastic! It made me miss being in a choir so bad! After that we went and just walked around Temple Square. I love Temple Square. Everything about it is just so peaceful and I love seeing the sister missionaries hard at work.

Oh how I love my Temple Square

New Music Video

Mormon Tabernacle Choir has a new music video. After watching it myself, it made me think about what our church is really about. Service. Helping others. Everyone has something to give whether it be time, money, advice, skills, even blood. Look for ways to help those in need. Those you help may one day be the ones helping you.

Speaker

It's talks like his that make me realize that I can be so much better. You know I thought I was doing pretty good until he gave his talk. We were privileged to have Neil L. Anderson come and speak to us at our stake conference up here in Ogden. One of the boys came and sat down next to us with a big grin on his face as he told us that he just shook Elder Neil L. Anderson's hand! Haha! But really to have him there in person was so cool! You could just feel the power of this newly called apostle as he spoke to us. Here are some things I got from the meeting. I was trying to write them down as fast as I could so hopefully I will be able to read them.

• Brent C. Nelson talked about the theme of Conference which was "If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear." He talked about a boy who was a great example to everyone. While in sports, he made sure that he always put the Lord first and knew that if he put his faith in the Lord, they could whip anyone. (age 15) He liked everyone and everyone liked him. He was used as an example for other missionaries while he served. He was dedicated to his church, his family, friends, and work. On his way to a work meeting on a plane, sometime went wrong and the plane crashed killing everyone. Brent C. Nelson then asked us this question. "Are you prepared?" Then I asked myself, am I striving to be a good example to others? Am I striving to be the best that I can be?
  
• Brother Simpson - Ogden Temple president talked about the scripture Mosiah 2:5 and how we all need to face the temple. We need our families to face the temple. He told of story of a primary teacher that took her kids to the temple and asked each of them to go up one at a time, to touch the temple. After each one had touched the temple she said to them, "Now you've touched the temple. When you grow up, let the temple touch you." I thought that was so cool. It made me aware of how grateful I am for a temple that is not even ten minutes from where I live and that I can go there and partake of the blessings it gives each and every one of us as we do temple work.
  

• Didn't catch her name but she is in the Presidency of the stake Relief Society. She also talked about being prepared and compared it to Noah and the ark and gave us seven things to help us. 1:Don't miss the boat - take advantage of what we have (prophets, temples, scriptures) 2: We are all in the same boat - We need to help each other. 3: Plan ahead - continue your education. Be prepared. 4: Don't listen to critics - Man's opinion doesn't matter. 5: Travel in pairs - Marriage. Lean on each other, move forward together in faith, and for those that haven't found the one, be that person you are looking for. 6: The ark was built by amateurs. Titanic was built by professionals. You know what happened to both - Joseph Smith was a little boy when he prayed to our Heavenly Father. In some way we are all amateurs in our callings, but as long as we do them faithfully we will be blessed. 7: No matter the storm, when with Heavenly Father, there is always a rainbow at the end - It will all work out. Do not fear.
• Neil L. Anderson started talking about how we need to be clay in Heavenly Father's hands. We need to learn to grow into the mantle that we have been given. Be mold able. Be Changeable. Then he talked about youth. "Joseph Smith was young, the Savior was young. Don't let your youth be an excuse. We have to account for what we are in our lives." Also talked about how we need to keep Christ as our center. He quoted Thomas S. Monson from this last general conference, "Some would like to keep one foot in Babylon, and one foot in Zion. This is not possible." Mentioned D&C 45:57 (speaking as for us in our days) Then he went on to talk about how the power of the Savior is real. Accept it. We must remember Him always that His spirit may abide with us always (sacrament prayer) This next part is my favorite part of his whole talk. He talked about how when he was a little boy he used to catch butterflies. He would gently catch them in his hand, then put it into a bottle expecting the butterfly to still fly around, but instead it couldn't fly and fell to the bottom of the jar. He then said the spirit of the Lord is like unto a butterflies wing. It is delicate and refined. When we do something to harm it, it does not return immediately. We can't go to a bad movie one night, then expect the spirit to be there the next day to help us.
  

What a blessing it was to hear from this newly called apostle. His love for our Saviour is great. His love for each of us is great. I'm so grateful to have a living prophet and apostles on the earth today to help and guide us through hard times. I am so grateful to have a loving Heavenly Father and a loving brother, Jesus Christ. We are never alone.

What an awesome way to start the week. This is what I needed.

Wetness

Today was a glorious day of rain, rain, and more rain! Everything is green and it smells amazing. The rain also brought back favorite memories of family visitings to Oregon which I treasure dearly. I could definitely live there. As I walked around campus today I saw the variety of colored umbrellas and rain boots....sadly I was not wearing mine. Wish I was because there were a lot of puddles that were just screaming my name. Now the only thing I don't like about the rain is the accumulation of nasty, slimy worms. They are EVERYWHERE! I tried very hard not to step on them but there were just too many of them; all different sizes. It was gross. As I was making my way to class through the sea of worms, a thought came into my head. I was thinking how grateful I was to be an evolved homo sapien and not a worm. Odd thought I know but seriously, how boring would your life be if you were a worm. To live underground most of the time until the ground becomes too soaked with water that it pushes you up and you slither your way around just to have people step on you. Do they eat? Can they smell? Do they have a brain...or at least a control center? Can they even think? Well it doesn't matter because I am not a worm. Thank heavens for that.

Emerging

As I walk around campus, my eyes behold all the little things that are emerging as spring is struggling to get here. The trees are budding and some even have blossoms that are blooming. Cute little flowers are popping out of the ground and the grass looks oh so green! I love it. Also emerging is the number of couples I see walking around campus. It's cute when you are with someone too, but right now it's just vexatious. They are EVERYWHERE! Not that I'm not happy where I am in my life right now, but it seems that everywhere I go, a couple pops out of nowhere, holding hands. Winter....not a couple in sight! Spring really is the time for things to happen and to emerge I guess.
Today at work a patient came in that had just given plasma. The dentist and one of the other assistants were talking to him about it when I came into the room to hear him say, "It hurts and you can still see the hole in my arm where they drew the blood!" I guess he and the dentist noticed the look on my face after he said that because the dentist turned to him and said, "she is giving plasma tomorrow.....and it's her first time!" The patient turns to me with a smile on his face and wishes me luck. Uh....okay?!? I'm not afraid of needles and any of that stuff, but this made me a little nervous. I have been told I have awesome veins from my nurse buddies so hopefully they will just have to poke me once. I will give you details about it tomorrow...if I am still alive.

Mixed Signals

Have you ever been in a situation where you meet a guy, decide he's a nice guy but don't really want to pursue anything, but you are nice to him, and he takes that and goes gung-ho with it? You show any signs of being nice to a boy and they think you are totally into them! Why is that? Don't get me wrong it happens with girls too. For example a guy holds a girls hand during a movie and here the girl is thinking "oh my gosh! This means our relationship is moving to the next level." and the boy is maybe thinking if anything at all, "hmm her hands are soft; this movie is freaking awesome!" Why can't there be a global signal that everyone knows about? Why can't there be the three second stare rule like in the movie "He's Just Not That Into You." It makes for a very awkward situation.

Amazed

I already wrote today but I just wanted to comment on how awesome my ward is. I look forward to every fast and testimony meeting because I get to hear so many wonderful testimonies. The spirit is constantly there and is felt very strongly. It's like a spiritual feeding and I never want it to end! I've never noticed how many converts that are in my ward. Many of them bore their testimony today and you could just see how blessed and happy their life had become because of the gospel. We have a member in our ward who just joined the church last year and it's been wonderful to see the changes that he has taken because of this choice he has made. Each one of them are such great examples to me in how they live their life. I'm so thankful to be part of such a wonderful ward, with an awesome bishopric, and a ward full of strong members of the church.

This will be my last post for this week as I decided that I need to take a break from technology for a week. I know some of us fall into this trap sometimes. I feel like I am always on the computer surfing the web when I have nothing else to do. I hope that by doing this it will help me to use this extra time doing the things I really should be doing such as more scripture study, baptisms, and service. I will post again after the week is over and let you all know how things went since this week will be full of fun things that I will be doing! Until then.