Work party of buffoonery

So today was my dental office's work party. I missed the one last year and they told me that I had to come this year. Well I wasn't going to make him come to this little gathering so I asked my very willing, (not really) roommate if she would come and be my date! She came and yes it was awkward for her at first, but pretty soon she was right at home! They had a very nice dinner set up for everyone and we both ate more than our share. Now there are around five dentists that work at this office and each of them have around 3-4 hygienists and around 4 assistants....so a lot of people! After dinner it came time for the initiation for those who are new to the office....which of course included me....blast! My boss came out with two golf clubs and two chairs and sat them across each other in the middle of the circle and sent me downstairs. My heart is pounding!! I really don't like doing these types of things but I kinda had to. So I sat downstairs for a couple of minutes and then heard them call my name for me to come up. I sulked up the stairs and had the most worried look on my face as I sat down. My boss then told me to sit down, gave me a golf club, and explained what I needed to do.
"Now I went to South Africa on my mission, and we had to be initiated into the Zoolo tribe before we could enter their house. So I have carried on that tradition here at the office. What you are going to do is mimic me in my movements with the golf club, which represents a spear, and repeat the chants after me. And be sure to match the volume and intensity."

(In my head...) oh dear....what am I doing here! I shouldn't have come!

I now will turn the time over to my roommate who was there to witness this glorious moment of my life.

Well...I only wish I would have had the foresight to bring a video camera to this blessed occasion. But I will do my best to relate all that happened. So Heather sat down with a face of sheer terror while the Dr. explained the origin of the initiation, he then felt inclined to make certain Heather knew that under no circumstances was the golf club to be used as a weapon. Dr. then proceeded to chant "za la ba zoo" while swinging the club precariously around his head. Heather laughed for a few seconds and then realized he was serious...a look of sheer determination came over her face as she repeated "za la ba zoo" Her performance was of such high caliber that she received a round of applause! Dr. continued to chant "ooh ta la!" and Heather resounded with the same fervor and zeal, "ooh ta la!" At this point Heather looked as though she felt relatively comfortable, if this was all she had to do, she could handle it. But the initiation was far from over. Dr. continued in his chant once again this time saying "aaaaah we we we!" and standing up with the club raised high above his head! Heather followed his example, but while her back was turned....one of the other guests snuck a sopping wet towel onto Heather's chair! She sat down and the look of confidence was replaced with the previous look of terror mixed with utter embarrassment. Bright red she sat there, unable to move from her chair as everyone just laughed at her....after about a minute she stood up and sheepishly made a dash for her chair covering herself all the way.

(back to me) With my behind sopping wet, we now got ready to exchange our white elephant gifts. We each took a turn opening a gift; there were some really funny gifts! One girl actually unwrapped a bag of Bath and Body hand soaps. It came to my roommates turn to either steal a gift, or to pick and unwrap a new gift. Well we were actually almost out of our hand soap back at the apartment so we both thought that would be perfect. So she stole it, and then I stole it from her so we could secure it make sure we got it, because after a gift gets stolen twice, no one else can take it. Hurray for yummy Holiday hand soaps from Bath and Body. Since my roommate had her gift stolen she had to pick another gift. She picked one from the middle and got a butterfly mat-making...latch....something...kit. We immediately started to make a devious plan to make the mat and ditch it at the boys house. After all, it would look lovely in their apartment. Unfortunately, several others thought it would be a lovely decoration and was stolen. She then picked another present and got really nice pair of Kermit the frog fleece gloves. These too were a hot item and were stolen. So she got up and spied a rubber duck shower radio to her right, and thought, "what a lovely addition that would make to our bathroom." But alas, that was stolen to put in a hot tub. Then she decided to steal a lovely Martha Stewart clock. I really dislike alarm clocks so this would be nice. But yet again...this was stolen. At that point in time, my roommate was exasperated and picked her last gift. She opened it to find a bag of chocolate, (a definite plus!) and three novels with death in the title. So we decided that the theme of the gift was "Death by chocolate!" Overall, the night was fantastic and we both had so much fun! I'm so glad to have all these awesome people to work with every day! It makes going to work so much fun.